Oh snaps.

Welcome to the internets. Where most of you spend countless hours during the week. We get paid to sit in front of the computer and pretend to do work, but really, we're finding out what Lindsay Lohan had for breakfast and googling awkward pictures of cats. Here's a toast (a blog toast because drinking is NOT allowed during work...) to all of you 40 hours a week craftsmen. Because let's be honest, we are all craftsmen. Do you know how hard it is to quickly exit a facebook browser?

Friday, April 29, 2011

The Fresh Prince With No Hair

Kazhdiy den' nam kapaet

This is the Russian version of Rick Ross' Hustlin'. You're welcome.



Obligatory Rebecca Black "Friday" Post

But this isn't that bad.  Why?  Because it's in Chinese.  I like this version better...

And I thought Mariah's pregnancy pics were bad...

THIS WINS.

AMAZING...WATCH THIS

This is the most complex way to make music.  But it's fucking beautiful.  Watch and enjoy...HAPPY FRIDAY YA'LL (in Britney Spears voice).

How do I get to the Jersey Shore?

Dude...what did you get arrested for?  Having the largest neck ever?!!  Geeeeez.  This is TERRIBLE.

What Royal Wedding?

There is too much talk about this Royal Wedding.  I accidently stumbled upon it this morning when I was getting home and ended up seeing a little.  Final verdict?  WHO CARES.  Even the flower girl doesn't care...

Greetings from See@ul (Seattle)

I haven't been blogging much today, but that's because I'm in Seattle!!  The first place my brother took me when I landed was Southcenter Mall.  Yup, the mall.  I get into his car and he says "Hey, want to eat at the mall?"  So we go and what do I see?  A man cutting his nails behind a bush.  We took a super sly picture of it...Hey, Welcome to Seattle.


Then after the mall, we went to Ikea.  Yup, Ikea.  Afterwards my brother took me to his office so that he can get his mail.  Oh vacation...

It Gets Better

In today's world, social issues are some of the most important topics discussed and debated- and everyone has an opinion. Sharing your beliefs about pertinent social issues like gay rights and abortion often make enemies out of strangers. But in a world so divided, it is important to remember that you have the option to be yourself- for you, and only you. You have the power to do what you believe is right when those around you may not see eye to eye.

Pixar brought together a group of their employees to speak about the journey each took in finding themselves. The nature of this video is simplistic, yet powerful. Each employee discuss their personal struggles with being gay and how with time, sense of self and a strong support group, the things you once thought impossible become reality.



Friends, remember that life is short. Do not take another moment for granted. There is truth in having the strength and courage to be yourself. Whether you are gay or straight, rich or poor, employed or unemployed, fat or skinny, strong or weak - be yourself. If you are struggling, remember- it gets better. If your friends or loved ones are struggling, remember to be a constant pillar of support as they find their direction. It is not simple, it is not easy. But one day you, and everyone in your life, will be proud and eternally happy that you have found your place.

Hope is the most precious treasure.


William + Kate are Now Married.

Hats, hats and more hats! Oh, and someone became a Princess.

This morning, my mother and my aunt, who is visiting from Minnesota, invited me over to watch the Royal Wedding of Kate and William. It aired live at 4am and as we watched a recording, scones were made, coffee was drunk and my mom handed out plastic tiaras to wear that she purchased at Claire's for the event... Trust me, I had no interest in watching this thing, but I'm a good daughter, and when lemon poppyseed scones are available to eat, I take part. And I put the damn tiara on my head. But let me tell you, this event was serious stuff! It was a spectacle unlike any other.

Aside from Kate Middleton looking gorgeous in an Alexander McQueen gown and Prince William looking like a handsom albeit balding Prince, the procession was beautiful inside Westminster Abbey. David and Victoria Beckham were there-David looked SO GOOD. Maybe the best I've ever seen him look, which I thought would be impossible after seeing him take his shirt off at a Galaxy game last year...


There were other notable guests including Elton John and his husband and all the British Royalty. And every.single.woman was wearing a hat. As an English tradition, I wasn't surprised, however, I was surprised at some of the stupid things women put on their heads. Princess Eugenie and Princess Beatrice, Williams cousins, looked the most ridiculous. Beatrice wore a hat that looked like a pale spider crawling across her forehead which earned her the dumbest-hat-of-the-day award. Don't these people look in the mirror before they attend an event millions of people will be watching? And don't get me started on Eugenie's dress...

All in all, it was beautiful-as expected. And now they're married. And Kate Middleton is a Princess. Yay.

In other news, have you ever Googled 'What is Prince Williams last name?' Because I just did. When he's not using his proper title Prince William, Duke of Cambridge (which is never), his technical surname is Mountbatten-Windsor. And now I know.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Monkey Tail Beards


There's a new fad sweepin' the nation...Monkey Tail Beards! I am a fan. So much so that I will send a box of stale peeps to anyone who grows one of these and sends us a picture... (workitLA@gmail.com)

Also, hit up www.themonkeytail.com for more glorious pictures of Monkey Tail Beards!!

Little girl LOOOOOVES Kid Cudi.

If you had a bad day, this will make it SO MUCH BETTER.  OH GAWWWD.  This is the cutest things I've seen in awhile.

Creepy.

I want to be friends with this girl.  Is that weird?

Lying Down Picture of the Day: Coachella

We received this great lying down picture from our friends Jim and Molly who took it at Coachella.

Very nice form, Jim. That hat looks like it was in true Coachella fashion. Thanks for the pic!!


OMG

This is England's newest reality show...a complete copy of the 'Jersey Shore' called the 'Geordie Shore.'


WTF

The Only Way to Sneak Into Coachella's VIP Section

NEXT YEAR I WILL BE DOING THIS.

If Donald Trump Becomes President....

OH SNAPZ.

OMG The President of the United States was born in...The United States

I'm sure you all saw President Barack Obama's birth certificate yesterday because it's the only newspiece everyone was talking about.  Well here's Obama talking about the situation and how people need to get over it...because there are more important things to take care of.  Honestly...do you really think the United States would elect a president not born in the US?!!  That's not something you just "forget to check."  C'mon folks...

If you didn't get the memo,

She likes boyz. If Ke$ha and Rebecca Black had a baby, it would be this weirdo.

And this is when the world shook

Fat Men + Scooter = Not a good idea.

Sign me up!

Where do you purchase these?

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

She's at it again...

If you enjoyed her Chris Brown cover, you'll enjoy this one...This girl has Jesus genes.  Damn.

Celebrate the Royal Wedding the right way

Have plans on Friday besides waking up at 4:30 AM to watch the Royal Wedding?  Well celebrate the weekend with the ladies of PYT at Haute in West Hollywood (across the street from The Abbey).  It's an OPEN BAR event but make sure to RSVP to write2pyt@gmail.com to get in for $25.  Remember it's OPEN BAR and hot ladies.  What more can you want?



Ever Seen a Camel Get Tickled?


Now you have.

Pricey Art


You are looking at the painting holds the record for highest price paid for a painting by a living artist.

In 2008, Lucian Freud's painting 'Benefits Supervisor Sleeping' sold for a whopping $33.6 million. It was purchased by a Russian Billionaire. That sure is a hefty price! I wonder where he hung it?

Fun facts: Lucian Freud is 88 years old and the grandson of Sigmund Freud. He is said to have 40 illegitimate children.

Brittana - you keep pulling on my heartstrings!!

WHO WATCHED GLEE LAST NIGHT?!
Yes, that is in all caps because that's how good the episode was.  Finally, Krakowsky came out of the closet and Santana is officially a lesbian (or a Lebanese according to Brittany).  The gang sang "Born this way" by Lady Gaga and wore shirts with their deepest secrets (although Kurt's "Likes Boys" tee wasn't a big secret...sorry Clay Aiken).  The moral of the episode was embracing who you are.  And I think the Glee kids did an amazing job.  If you haven't seen the episode, please do so NOW.  I'm not going to lie, I cried a couple of times.  Not because I was sad, but because of pure joy.  Great episode.  BRITTANA FOREVER!!



[Oh Brittana...just be together already]

Napoleon Dynamite is so stoked...

This is a real life LIGER.  A lion and a tiger mixed...DUH.  Look how adorable they are!! I love how they just look like chubby tigers.  These adorbs specimens can be found in South Carolina.  And yes, I just looked up flights to South Carolina.

This is How You Party

Take note.

RIP Typewriter



The last producers of the typewriter shut their doors in India after only selling 800 units last year. This doesn't come as a surprise because computers are taking over the world, but how how sad is this news?! There's nothing like the sound of those typewriter keys...RIP Typewriter.

Manny Pacquaio: A Man of Many Talents

Boxer, Philippine Senator, Singer.

Those are three things I never thought one single man could ever be. However, the most famous boxer in the world at the moment, Manny Pacquaio, is all three.

He's won a bunch of title matches and belts (or whatever you say when you win boxing things), he's a Senator in the Philippines and now, he has a hit new single. This guy's got it all! Listen to him singing here on Jimmy Kimmel with Will Ferrell. It just may be the best rendition of John Lennon's Imagine ever.


You can also listen to Manny's new single, Sometimes When We Touch, HERE.


Happy Hump Day!

Hope everyone is having a wonderful Wednesday. Here in LA, it's a beautiful day and it feels like summertime! Here's a little tune to get your day movin', and to get you excited for the upcoming season.

I want Justin Bieber in my mouth.

Oh yay! My dream came true!! A Justin Bieber (lesbian) toothbrush is out that sings Baby to you while you brush, floss and scrape your tongue. Just what I wanted...

I hope I can buy these at Costco so I can get a million of them...

Galactic Greetings!

I received possibly one of the best emails ever this morning from Keripedia. She went to Disneyland yesterday with her parents for an early Mothers Day celebration and this was fresh in my inbox just a few minutes ago...

"This is what happens when you go to Disneyland with only 3 people...

You astro blast by yourself. I'm not sure which one was more awkward - coming out at the end of this ride by myself or Mr. Toad's Wild ride..."

If you've never been to Disneyland, this is the Toy Story Astro Blaster ride and it's totally fun to try and score more points than your partner...that is, if you have one.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

He's a keeper...

...Reason #4387498234 I'm a lesbian.  Only a guy would buy this.  Gross.

The BEST.

Can we bring Missed Connections back in style?  OkThanks.

FYI: MARK YOUR CALENDAR-

ON MAY 31, 2011 FRIENDSTER WILL BE SHUTTING DOWN.
Hmm...Okay. I got this news today and I said, "Who the fuck cares". So unless you're still living in 2002 you better save all of your Friendster information. If you go to the site, there's an option to save/export all of your current Friendster information. You better get on it! You don't want to lose your precious information. Oh wait, you probably have "back up" information or more importantly, information from THIS YEAR on facebook. Good riddance Friendster...you started it all. You will be missed by... NO ONE.

PYT Productions + Work It LA = Open Bar all the time :)

We have a new sponsor! I don't really know what that means, but basically Corey and I will be able to go to LA's hottest events and recap it for you guys because of our new sponsor-PYT Productions! Most of the events are open bar all night long - which means you pay a small amount to get in, yet sip on Patron all night long like P.Diddy. I'm pretty stoked for this "partnership." Mercado + Corey + Open Bar = Soul Mates.

Double Dream Feet

I am LOVING THIS (maybe a little too much...). This guy is fantastic and the song he uses is just as incredible as his dancing. You may remember him from his first hit "Double Dream Hands." Well, ladies and gents, may I introduce-DOUBLE DREAM FEET by John Jacobson.



I would love to party with this guy.

You can thank these guys

The three frat dudes that invented Four Loko have revealed themselves. Yup, looks about right. They look like the guys that got you drunk and "walked" you home only to find yourself buying the Plan B pill the next morning. Great job guys! You made the art of blacking out legal...

Jeff Wright, Jaison Freeman and Chris Hunter decided to keep their identities a secret because people were "demonizing Four Loko with bad associations" AKA the drink was killing people. Thanks dudes! You've provided my friends and I some great memories...that we don't really remember.

Overheard at Disneyland's California Adventure

In an email from Keri (who is at Disneyland Resort today...jealous!!)

"P.s. Just saw some kid puke all over the place after getting off the Screaming California roller coaster - sweet."


Creepy

I really hope that's not her dad...

Nerd rapper addresses bullying.

This is simply fantastic.  Although, he just looks like that guy who used to hold Puff Daddy's umbrella...

Xtina Talks Superbowl Screwup

Remember when Christina Aguilera screwed up the National Anthem at the Superbowl earlier this year? It wasn't a terribly huge screw up, but still-it happened. Well, she went on Ellen to talk her new show "The Voice" and the Superbowl mistake was brought up in conversation. Aguilera told Ellen:

"And then it was like, oh. That night I knew, I just made myself a Trivial Pursuit question," she joked. "'In 2011 what female singer, ya know, flubbed the lyrics.' It's just insane. But I have a really good laugh about it and you get over things. You get back up again and you just prove to yourself and to everyone you that much stronger."

That was boring. At least it "Makes her that much stronger...makes her work a little bit harrdderr!!!"



Homegirl,

You have GOT to stop being creepy with your baby bump.  Seriously, this has to stop Mariah.  Your twins will be made fun off when they're older because mom was a big creep before they were born...

You Will Never Forget Your Credit Card at a Bar Again

A new iPhone app called "Remember It" is making it terribly difficult for you to forget your credit card at a bar ever again. The app lets you set an alarm based on your location and it alerts you when you have moved 50, 200 or 500 feet away from the set location.

If you remember to set the alarm before you go out and don't drop your phone in the toilet during your blackout, this app is for you!


Great way to do it!

Hey, if you're ever in a bind and don't have time to break up with your girlfriend (I'm so busy!! Busy busy busy!!!), then do it on the largest online forum...Reddit.  What a lucky gal to be wasting 5 years with this jerkoff. Hey dude, GROW A PAIR.

This guy's an idiot

NFL player Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari announced their engagement yesterday.  This guy is going to regret this down the line.  As Kanye would say, "If you ain't no chump holler we want pre-nup!  We want pre-nup!"


Here is my one encounter with Kristin Cavallari in a bathroom in Mexico.  Obviously, this was NOT taken recently...Oh girrrrrl.  Remember when we took tequila shots together?  Remember when we made out after that shot?  Yeah, that didn't happen.

[my eye make up is AMAZING]

Mmmbop!

Hanson performed there pre-puberty hit "Mmmbop" on Dancing with the Stars last night.  Why?  Who cares! It was awesome!  I know all you fools lurves this song...

Easter really makes you think...

Monday, April 25, 2011

Spike Lee FAIL.

Please refrain from using your iPad to take a picture of the President.  C'mon now...

Overheard in the office

A co-worker just stood by my desk and said,

"I wish someone would just tell me what I'm supposed to be doing."

Don't we all...

Oh work.  What a gal.

Lying Down Picture of the Day: Cheese!

This weekend Merc, Keri, Daniel and I went to the Grilled Cheese Invitational- a grilled cheese festival and competition in downtown LA. The event was sponsored by Tillamook and provided more cheese and cheese-related products you could ever imagine all day long. Free cheese squares, grilled cheese, pickles, chips, and drinks at your disposal. There was even a beer garden! We were judges for the competition and tried some pretty delicious and creative grilled cheese sandwiches whipped up by competitors. My favorite? The jalapeƱo mad: goat cheese and jalapeƱos.

Here is the cheesy lying down picture of the day: me and the Tillamook van!

59 Questions About Lady Gaga

Esquire Magazine recently published an article on their website with 59 questions about Lady Gaga. Now, I happen to like dancing to Lady Gaga as much as the next fan, but author Stephan Marche isn't quite her biggest fan. He makes some funny and arguably good points about the 'Born this Way' pop star.

Some examples include:
-"Isn't Lady Gaga just Britney Spears spackled with art-school cliches?"

-"How can she mean so little and so much to so many?"

-"Why did we all laugh at Bjork when she wore a swan but cheered at Gaga when she wore Kermits?"


Read the whole article HERE.

The Answer is YES

The Top Highest Earning Reality Stars

I'm shocked with most of this list.  Last I check, it's 2011 and most of these mofos are nobodies now.

Kendra Wilkinson - $2 million
Hugh Hefner's ex on The Girls Next Door, married to NFL player and now shakes her butt on Dancing with the Stars

Pauly D - $2 million
Jersey Shore and a "DJ" (in quotes, because I doubt he's a real dj)

Khloe Kardashian - $2.5 millin
A Kardashian.  Married to a Laker.  Nuff said.

The Situation - $3 million
Jersey Shore resident douchebag.

Kate Gosselin - $3.5 million
Formerly of Jon and Kate Plus 8, now it's just Kate Plus 8 and a new haircut.

Audrina Patridge - $3.5 million
Ceiling eyes on The Hills.  I have no idea what she does now.  Why is she on this list?


Bethenny Frankel - $4 million
Bravo reality star (a housewife) and now a diet "expert" because she wrote some books.

Lauren Conrad - $5 million
Started off on Laguna Beach, then The Hills and now she has her own fashion line and beauty website.  She lives in Huntington Beach with her dog Morgan and I see her every weekend.  Oh wait, that's Keripedia.  My bad.

Kim Kardashian - $6 million
A Kardashian.  Dates the brothas.  Made a sex tape.  Has a big booty.

Unemployment FAIL

Whose idea was this?


I know, I think it's kinda funny too. But maybe that money could be spent, I don't know, helping the unemployed get JOBS?!


Just released Royal Wedding guest list

Unfortunately I didn't make the cut.
But who did?

Rowan Atkinson (Mr. Bean...WTF)
Elton John (Duh...)
Victoria and David Beckham (I'd go just to see them...rather than boring Will and Kate)
Guy Ritchie (Formerly Mr. Madonna)
And several others...
To see the complete list CLICK HERE.

Mr. Bean...really?!!

Prince: The Welcome to America Tour

Friday night my friend Brad and I headed down to the Great Western Forum to see Prince perform. He is currently in Los Angeles for his "Welcome to America" Tour. He played Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights at the Forum and is set to play 17 more shows in the upcoming weeks. I highly recommend checking out one of the remaining dates if you can-his show was incredible!

The stage presence Prince portrays in concert is unlike anyone else. We were on our feet dancing the entire time and his fabulous outfits, backup singers and dancers didn't fail to impress. I've always loved his music, but I never considered myself the biggest Prince fan. However, since Friday-I've had 'Purple Rain' on repeat! He is 52 years old and still rocking out like he's 25.

The show was full of surprises. Besides playing every great song you'd want him to play (he actually exclaimed half-way though a montage of songs 'I have too many hits!!'), he had some pretty exciting guests join him on the stage. While playing and dancing to Michael Jacksons 'Don't Stop Till You Get Enough,' Prince pulled Cuba Gooding Jr. onstage and they danced together for a solid 5 minutes. Turns out, Cuba can hang.

Towards the end of the show, the place went dark and a loud, booming voice started singing. The lights came on and as Prince played the piano, Alicia Keys walked on stage. Homegirl can SING. I wasn't ever the biggest Alicia Keys fan either, but seeing her live has definitely changed that. She's got some set of pipes.

After 3 encores and an epic show stopping performance of 'Purple Rain,' Prince finally left the stage. The entire audience sat for about 30 minutes waiting for him to come back out. We even did the wave. After 45 minutes, 2/3 of the attendees were gone. Brad insisted we stay, promising Prince would be back, so we sat. One hour after the show ended, sure enough, Prince came out...and rode a bike around the forum. That was the last we saw of him that night. And it was well worth the wait.

Prince on a Bike

The Shape of Prince's Stage: His famous Symbol

NES Lunchbox

Done and done.  I want this NOW.

Getting Peeped.

Is everyone sick of peeps yet? If so, take your leftover marshmallow candy blow it up in the microwave. If you've already done that, how about "peeping" someones house? It's like TP'ing-but with peeps! Watch this video about a Seattle house getting peeped last night on Easter.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Future Princess

The Royal Wedding is this week!  Anyone excited?!!  Yup, me either.  Here's a picture of Kate "Blah" Middleton.  Yes, you can see up her skirt.  Yes, she's wearing underwear.

Kate Middleton - 1
Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears - 0

Kate Middleton - Future Princess
Lindsay Lohan - in jail
Paris Hilton - Who?
Britney Spears - Cray Cray

Lesson:  WEAR UNDERWEAR.

Warren G's Tribute

Everyone in LA is still upset about Nate Dogg's passing a month ago.  Warren G is releasing a tribute to the soulful rapper entitled "This is dedicated to you."  Take a listen!  RIP Nate Dogg.

Remember when I asked what happened to Da Brat?

Well she just got a Michael Jackson tattoo.  Yup, that's her leg.  Wow.


HAPPY MONDAY!

I hope you all had an EGGcellent Easter.  It probably feels *great* to be back at work!  Only 4 more days until the weekend right?  Hey, at least you weren't this news reporter...ugh.  THE WIND!!



Sunday, April 24, 2011

Happy Birthday Bentley!!

Today was my dog's 6th birthday.  I've known this little man since he was a puppy and I love him more than anything in this world (even more than McChickens!).  If you're reading this Bentley, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!  I'll buy you a shot at the bar tonight!