Oh snaps.

Welcome to the internets. Where most of you spend countless hours during the week. We get paid to sit in front of the computer and pretend to do work, but really, we're finding out what Lindsay Lohan had for breakfast and googling awkward pictures of cats. Here's a toast (a blog toast because drinking is NOT allowed during work...) to all of you 40 hours a week craftsmen. Because let's be honest, we are all craftsmen. Do you know how hard it is to quickly exit a facebook browser?

Thursday, June 30, 2011

When Cozzolino has a baby...

This will be Buster in comparison.  If you don't know, Cozzolino's cat is fat.  Like REALLY fat...

Diary of Zac Efron

I wish this was real...
But alas, we can't have everything in life right?  What I would give to get my hands on Zac Efron...I mean, Zac Efron's diary...

To read more and follow, CLICK HERE.

Kitten plays dead...

Well actually we don't really know if she's playing dead or if she is dead.  But regardless, it's cute!  Wake up kitty!  You're such an adorbz little actor!!

Remember when James Brown sold soup?

He was hoping we would never find this...WOW.

It's Lunch Time!

Hey, Merc-I found ya the perfect deal for ya!

The Countess - "Chic C'est La Vie"

My friend Alli tweeted me this yesterday.  Thank you?  I don't know what to think.  It's The Countess from Real Housewives of New York singing her new single "Chic C'est La Vie."  I don't think she's singing.  She's basically talking.  But it's not rap...it's just...well, it's HORRIBLE.  For some reason I listened to the whole song - and no, it didn't get better...

8 inches.

No, not those inches.

Christian Louboutin has designed a pair of 8 inch stilettos. Would you wear these? CAN YOU WALK IN THESE? Geez. Apparently he made them for a silent charity auction to raise funds for the English National Ballet. Oh yeah, that makes sense.

Pee here please

These are some clever urinals!  Why don't they make some cool looking toilets?  If they did, I promise to stop peeing outside against apartment buildings.  Just sayin'.

This Is Cheese Rolling

I can't tell you exactly what's going on here other than the fact that there are lots of people rolling down a very steep hill, that it's hilarious, and that it's called 'cheese rolling.'

Male Cheerleader

Remember when Raphy was a male cheerleader in high school?  Whenever he told me about his cheer days, I envision it to be similar to this Chinese boy.  Nice moves duder!

Adele is Rolling in the Deep

Get it?!  Okay, it's only one day until a 3 day weekend - I'm a little over work!  Get over it...

One day...

This is what $100 million in your bank account looks like.  This receipt was found in the Hamptons.  No big deal...

Douchiest Photo of the Year

U2 played in Miami last night and after the show, Bono and Lebron (and his girlfriend) took this incredibly douchy photo and put it up on Twitter. There is a whole lot of suck going on in this one.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

It's time for Chris Hansen to take a seat...

Chris Hansen, the famous host of Dateline NBC's To Catch a Predator was recently caught cheating on his wife by hidden cameras!  Hansen, who is 51 years old, has been having an affair with Kristyn Caddell, a 30 year old from Florida (she is also a journalist).  Although she's not a minor, she's still 20 years his junior!  Even better is the fact that this whole thing was an undercover sting operation arranged by The National Enquirer.  HAHAHAHAHA What an idiot!

Here's the chick (they look related no?)

The Worst Songs Ever in ONE song.

Love Garfunkel and Oates.  Because they do shit like this.  I would buy this song!!!

Oh Justin.

Look what you've done...


The best way to remember the moment you met the President? Snap a picture real quick mid-hug.... this is so awkward.

David Duchovny is Single and Still Sexy

Does anyone watch Californication on Showtime? The show follows the insane stories of a crass and promiscuous novel/screenplay writer in Venice Beach and throughout LA. David Duchovny (of The X-Files Fame) plays said writer, and he plays said writer brilliantly. The show is raunchy and hilarious and Duchovny is SEXY. Who knew the guy from the X-Files could be sexy? Well, he is. But before you cue up Netflix know that the show is not for prude eyes, there is a plethora of drugs and sex involved.

Anyway, it's a great show, start watching it. The point of this post is to let you know that David Duchovny has split from his actress wife Tea Leoni-which means there is still hope for me to swoop in. A girl can dream, right?

No Strings Attached vs. Friends with Benefits

Ok, my friend and I were talking about this new "Friends with Benefits" movie that is coming out starring Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis. We called it "No Strings Attached Part 2". IT'S THE SAME MOVIE. Finally someone made a trailer showcasing the THE SAME STORY. Check it out - PS No Strings Attached was kind of good. But I don't think I can watch Justin Timberlake act anymore.

James Franco's Band - new music video

You have to be s...t...o...n...e...d... to enjoy this.  Just sayin'.
What a fucking weirdo.

PS The band's name is Kalup and Franco. And the song is Rising. There's only like 5 lyrics in the whole song.

Lady Gaga launches a Tumblr

Lady Gaga has joined the Tumblr world.  If you visit her site, you will be able to see weird outfits she wears on the daily.  There's not much on there right now, but I'm excited to see what develops...

Click HERE to see the Gaga Tumble.

John Lennon snorting coke.

Pun intended.

Hooray!! LiLo is FREE!!

Today marks the day when Lindsay Lohan can safely roam the streets - she has officially been released from house arrest!  It's been so long since she's been in the sunshine!  Oh wait - she threw parties everyday on her rooftop in Venice.  It's been so long since she's done any filming.  Oh wait - she did that too.  Damn, was she really under house arrest?  Sounds like NOTHING changed.  Well, welcome back to the real world LiLo.  Those 35 days were probably so hard. 

Lying Down Game FAIL

And this is why people die playing this game. Be safe while playing the lying down game, or else you look like an idiot while someone is filming you (and then puts it up on YouTube. And then we put it on our blog)

Cat Problems SOLVED

THIS.IS.BRILLIANT. If you have a cat who sheds a ton, this idea will blow your mind...

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

The Pope is a hipster...

He just joined Twitter and got himself a nice new iPad!  Check out this video of him learning how to use an iPad.  It's so awkward, it's cute.  WWJD?

Lenny Kravitz is cool, yo'

I love that he has an attachment to his iPhone...I WANT ONE OF THESE.  What a badass...

The Beatles in 2011?

Thoughts? If they were signed today...
(John Lennon would totes be Justin Timberlake BTW)...

Newsweek is Creepy

To celebrate Princess Diana's 50th birthday, Newsweek has photoshopped a picture of her and Kate Middleton walking together with the headline "What if?" Well Newsweek, you've officially succeeded in creeping me out. This is just plain WEIRD!!

Lying Down Game Picture of the Day

Fuck Planking.  We're still Lying Down.  Thanks for the submission Taylor!!!

McDonald's knows how to start your day off right

Because the best way to start your morning is with a sausage in yo but (it'll only cost you a dollar!)

A Day in the Life of a Cat

This is a seriously lazy/bored cat. If my cat were to see a fly she'd freak the hell out and swat until it's no more. But not this guy. I'm glad someone got this on camera though, just proves that cats do whatever they want. Ahhh...the life of a cat...

How Romantic...

I'm going to bring back Craigslist Missed Connections.  I forgot how crazy they were.  This one takes the cake for sure...


Good point...


Google hates Fat People

A woman who recently applied for a job at Google says she didn't get the job because she's overweight.  She was one of seven overweight women removed from the face to face interview process.  The seven that were removed were all overweight - and the rest of the 20 were thin.  Of course Google claims this story is ridiculous, but the woman has more proof - she says two out of three sections of the exam you have to take during the interview had to do with fitness logic and during her phone interview Google only wanted to know how she was active outside of work.  You know what's going to happen now right?  Google will now only hire fat people to reverse these claims.  Good thing I'm PHAT...

Snooki is Still Snooki

Isn't it good to know that Snookie went to Italy to film another season of 'Jersey Shore' and didn't come back with any fashion sense. Take a look at this outfit: It's perfectly horrible. My favorite part are the matching hello kitty purse and belt. Una bella ragazza!




Cool outfit Chris Brown

Chris Brown wore this outfit at the BET Awards.  And he wonders why people still hate him?  Holy Spongebob.

Monday, June 27, 2011

SEATTLE, What song are you listening to?

There's a new street game going viral where a couple of guys travel the world asking people "What song are you listening to?"  Check out the awesome video below from Seattle.  To check out more, CLICK HERE.  If I were playing this game right now, the song I'm currently listening to is "A Song for You" by Donny Hathaway.  WHAT SONG ARE YOU LISTENING TO?


Umm...I officially have a crush.  Agustina Woodgate from Miami goes to thrift stores and sews poetry inside the clothes.  They like to call it "Poetry Bombing."  I'm officially in love.  Someone in Miami send me something with her poetry in it!!

Michael Jackson's "Thriller" jacket sold!

The famous black and red jacket that Michael Jackson wore in the epic "Thriller" video was sold for $1.8 million!  The person who bought it is some man from Texas named Milton Verret.  He says he will use it as a fundraising tool for children's charities.  Also - a portion of the sale will go to the Shambala Preserve - a big cat sanctuary caring for two tigers that Michael used to own.  It's just the gift that keeps on giving!

Now playing...Thriller.

Are You Eco-Friendly?

Being eco-conscious and a friend to the environment is important these days. Plus, if you're not eco-friendly, you look like an asshole. But sometimes, I accidentally use styrofoam cups to drink coffee out of at work (instead of the coffee mug sitting on my desk), and when I'm lazy at home and don't want to wash dishes, I'll use paper plates. SO SUE ME! Well, my brother found this hilarious water bottle from The Onion Store that pretty much sums things up. I should invest in one, maybe I'll actually start to use it...

Ugliest Dog 2011 Champion

I just read in an article published on Refinery29.com that the Sonoma-Marin County Fair's Ugliest Dog Competition has found a winner! Let me introduce you to Yoda-who is taking home the esteemed honor of Champion in the Ugliest Dog Competition. Somehow, the name Yoda fits.

Former New York City Mayor gave Carol Brady Crabs

Florence Henderson, aka TV's most chipper mother on 'The Brady Bunch,' has revealed in her new memoir that former New York City Mayor John Lindsay gave her crabs. Lindsay was the mayor from 1966-1973, and apparently Henderson was lonely one evening and engaged in a one-night stand with the politician. I guess in the 70's, one night stands resulted in crabs.

Here's the real question: who is actually going to buy Florence Henderson's Memoir??!

Charlie Sheen's Goddess Peaces Out

In Charlie Sheen news: one of his 'goddesses,' Natalie Kenly, has left him. I know I know, too much Charlie! But that's the news and it's our job to report it.

So, she left him and then he demanded she give back the Mercedes Benz he bought her. Reports say Sheen is 'brushing off the breakup' by rolling around in the millions of dollars he apparently has, and celebrating by having sex with 3 women from 'Mexico, Australia and Columbia.'
Good for him!

News Anchors Think Farts are Funny!

Watch this news anchor struggle not to laugh as she tries to get through a story about farts. She doesn't make it to the end of the story, and her co-anchor tries takes over.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Happy Friday!

Here's a banana hammock for ya. Have a great weekend, friends!

CPotD: Cat Picture of the Day

Horse Shoes

I have found a pair of shoes that all of you ladies can lust over! No, these are not the traditional horseshoes you toss onto a metal steak while visiting your grandpa in Nantucket. These are horse shoes...for your feet, made out of dead animal parts and other materials (re: guns). Some German based artist by the name of Iris Schieferstein decided it was necessary that they be crafted. But hey, who am I to stand in the way of someone's creativity?!

Okay, so these are weird. But I can't say that I wouldn't like to try them on...

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Be Careful What You Blog

On Tuesday in Taiwan a blogger by the name of Liu was sentenced to 30 days in detention, 2 years probation and ordered to pay $200,000 Taiwan dollars for writing a bad review about a restaurant on her blog. The restaurant owner accused her of defamation and now she's facing the charges.

In her blog post, she wrote that the restaurant's food was too salty, the place had cockroaches and the owner was a 'bully.'

The whole thing is completely bizarre. If the restaurant actually had cockroaches people need to know about it! And the claim that the restaurant used too much salt isn't exactly a huge diss. Thankfully we're not blogging in Taiwan, or we'd have the Taiwanese version of the Kardashian's accusing us of some sort of defamation...(but, c'mon, it's not my fault that they look like wax statues!)

Killer Granny

So I found this picture of what my good friend Morgan is going to look like when she grows up:

Love you, Pookie!

Who Do You Follow? P.3

Alright, So I’ve started following actual friends. Yes, real people I know (although I’m totes BFF’s with the Bronx Zoo Cobra).

But never fear, in the midst of following actual friends I let an occasional idiot slip through the cracks…my most recent follower: @Joe_Hollywood. I couldn’t tell you a damn thing about this clown but he’s got over 43,000 followers and apparently if you don’t follow him you’ll be lost. Even though he has a profile picture, I still imagine him looking something like this... I think I’d rather be lost.

If you are in the market for some good old-fashioned-fun tweeters, check ‘em out:
- @WorkitLA
- @MercadoSays

What An Ass.

Kim K. recently got an X-Ray of her ass to prove it's real.

No seriously, she did. Here's the article. Still don't believe me, watch the video.

WARNING: You will lose brain cells for every second you watch.

Because who wants a framed picture of yourself in the hallway when you can have a framed X-Ray of your bee-hind.

Chimps Being Chimps


Mrs. Edwards Sounds like a Fun Teacher...

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

CPotD: Cat Picture of the Day: Cat Boss

Whatever you say, Cat Boss.

Playoff Withdrawals

NBA season is over (congrats Mavs), playoffs are over, the NFL lockout is on and I feel like I have nothing to live for...besides MLB - which I don't give 2 shits about unless I'm in the stands watching with a cold beer.

So because there's nothing to report about, I'll opt for making fun of the athletes themsevles. I present to you NBA Dopplegangers...enjoy

Madame Tussauds Presents Khloe and Kim

Is it just me, or do Khloe and Kim look like wax dolls? Is this picture even real? Lamar is the only one who looks normal. It's probably because he is wearing the least make-up of the bunch.

At least they're supportive?

Wimbledon Win

Gaga is that you? Tennis has gotten so weird. I remember when having pink spandex under your skirt was a fashion statement.

I mean, really?

Bike Lanes

This video was made by a guy named Casey Neistat who got a ticket for not riding his bike in a bike lane in New York City. Turns out, the 'crime' wasn't illegal and he shouldn't have been ticketed. However, he made a great little public service announcement about it that includes him hilariously falling off his bike/slamming into things that makes for some great entertainment. Dear cops everywhere, are you watching?

Lacrosse Announcer Channels The Notorious B.I.G.

Umm...WHY?!  It's just so...awkward...

Weird Al is Still Weird

Weird Al's video of 'Perform This Way,' a parody of Lady Gaga's 'Born this Way,' is so incredibly strange that I'm not sure how to react. It's funny, and certainly takes a good, comedic jab at Gaga's crazy style. But something about seeing Al's face on that Lady's body with all those costumes makes me incredibly awkward...