Work It LA

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Don't be a drag, just be a queen

SLOW WEEK take 2. All of the trending "News" topics are the fact that Lady Gaga released lyrics to her new song "Born this way". Umm...okay. I guess I'll just read these lyrics and try to guess what the actual song sounds like...

INTRO:
It doesn’t matter if you love him, or capital H-I-M
Just put your paws up
’cause you were Born This Way, Baby

VERSE:
MY MAMA TOLD ME WHEN I WAS YOUNG
WE ARE ALL BORN SUPERSTARS

SHE ROLLED MY HAIR AND PUT MY LIPSTICK ON
IN THE GLASS OF HER BOUDOIR

“THERE’S NOTHIN WRONG WITH LOVIN WHO YOU ARE”
SHE SAID, “‘CAUSE HE MADE YOU PERFECT, BABE”

“SO HOLD YOUR HEAD UP GIRL AND YOU’LL GO FAR,
LISTEN TO ME WHEN I SAY”

CHORUS:
I’M BEAUTIFUL IN MY WAY
‘CAUSE GOD MAKES NO MISTAKES
I’M ON THE RIGHT TRACK BABY
I WAS BORN THIS WAY

DON’T HIDE YOURSELF IN REGRET
JUST LOVE YOURSELF AND YOU’RE SET
I’M ON THE RIGHT TRACK BABY
I WAS BORN THIS WAY

POST-CHORUS:
OOO THERE AIN’T NO OTHER WAY
BABY I WAS BORN THIS WAY
BABY I WAS BORN THIS WAY
OOO THERE AIN’T NO OTHER WAY
BABY I WAS BORN-
I’M ON THE RIGHT TRACK BABY
I WAS BORN THIS WAY

DON’T BE A DRAG -JUST BE A QUEEN
DON’T BE A DRAG -JUST BE A QUEEN
DON’T BE A DRAG -JUST BE A QUEEN
DON’T BE!

VERSE:
GIVE YOURSELF PRUDENCE
AND LOVE YOUR FRIENDSKID, REJOICE YOUR TRUTH

IN THE RELIGION OF THE INSECURE
I MUST BE MYSELF, RESPECT MY YOUTH

A DIFFERENT LOVER IS NOT A SIN
BELIEVE CAPITAL H-I-M (HEY HEY HEY)
I LOVE MY LIFE I LOVE THIS RECORD AND
MI AMORE VOLE FE YAH (LOVE NEEDS FAITH)

REPEAT CHORUS + POST-CHORUS

BRIDGE:

DON’T BE A DRAG, JUST BE A QUEEN
WHETHER YOU’RE BROKE OR EVERGREEN
YOU’RE BLACK, WHITE, BEIGE, CHOLA DESCENT
YOU’RE LEBANESE, YOU’RE ORIENT
WHETHER LIFE’S DISABILITIES
LEFT YOU OUTCAST, BULLIED, OR TEASED
REJOICE AND LOVE YOURSELF TODAY
‘CAUSE BABY YOU WERE BORN THIS WAY

NO MATTER GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BI,
LESBIAN, TRANSGENDERED LIFE
I’M ON THE RIGHT TRACK BABY
I WAS BORN TO SURVIVE
NO MATTER BLACK, WHITE OR BEIGE
CHOLA OR ORIENT MADE
I’M ON THE RIGHT TRACK BABY
I WAS BORN TO BE BRAVE

REPEAT CHORUS

OUTRO/REFRAIN:

I WAS BORN THIS WAY HEY!
I WAS BORN THIS WAY HEY!
I’M ON THE RIGHT TRACK BABY
I WAS BORN THIS WAY HEY!

10 bucks to the first person who calls this person...

Catapulting Marijuana Over the Border

Apparently, there is a new way to smuggle marijuana over the Arizona-Mexico border. Recently, Mexican officials seized 45-pounds of weed, an SUV and-get this-a CATAPULT. Yes, they were catapulting packages of pot over the boarder.

Can't say it's not clever. It might even be the most creative way to smuggle drugs over the border yet.

The smugglers got away before the officials could catch them, but authorities did release this video of them actually catapulting weed over the boarder.

Do you think there is some sort of "3 flies up" game going on on the other side of the border?

Edgar Allan Poe must be PISSED.

Look where you can find him...right next to the Snooki Monster. Awesome.

Deal with it.

Yahoo! News did a riveting story on how President Obama got stuck in traffic last night because of the snow. Really?! Well President, you should try sitting in traffic EVERYDAY like most Americans. Get over it.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Spotted...a real life dummy.

Here Lounge in West Hollywood offers an open bar every Wednesday from 8pm-11. You pay $5 to get in then you drink until your little hearts desire (well until 11pm). It's such a great deal! I've gone a couple of times and it's definitely a money saver. Especially if you show up right at 8pm. And you order 2 drinks every time you go to the bar. Last week I went and I saw a real life dummy. Seriously, I was expecting to see a ventriloquist attached to this mother fucker. Spotted was Kim Vo - hairstylist to the stars and judge on Bravo's Shear Genius. He gave me a kiss on the cheek and told me I was fabulous - I left with more make up on then what I came with. Thanks Kim! You are a robot.

It's a slow day for me...

So slow that the news I have to offer is going to make you yawn.

Milton Levine, the creator of the ant farm died at the age of 97. It's a sad day for...umm...well...his family.

WHO NEEDS A PLACE TO LIVE?

Ok, friends. It's crunch time.

My roommate Stephanie and I need a new roommate. Our friend, 3rd roommate and most frequent winner of the "Ke$ha Award" recently moved out to accept a job at Facebook and is now living in San Francisco. We have to fill her room. Like, ASAP. Like, by Febuary 1st.

So here is the deal, which one of you wants to live a CARTWHEEL's distance (not even a block) from the beach in Playa del Rey in a little community of homes called "The Jungle," with two rad chicks who happen to sit on a sofa given to them from Kevin Nealon.

This is the craigslist add-http://losangeles.craigslist.org/wst/roo/2182138441.html. Ch-ch-check it out!

Cochella Tickets are Sold Out

I hope you got yours!

I didn't.

I'm pissed! First you tell me that Kings of Leon is a headliner and NOW THIS?!

I bought mine last year in March. The fact that they sold out in a mere week is baffling. Scalping, ebay, craigslist here I come.

This is How They Picnic in Albania

I'm suggesting this to HR as to how the next company picnic should go down.

TOTAL Bummer for Whoever Received This

Pot Cookies for the Kiddies

In Covina, California, two girls ages 10 and 11 were hospitalized for feeling ill after eating a chocolate chip cookie they found on their kitchen counter.

Turns out, it was a pot cookie the mom had left lyin' around.

Are you kidding me?! What is she doin' keeping that thing out when the kids are home from school? No shit your kids are going to eat it-it's a cookie. Cookies are delicious and children always want to eat them warm with milk.

Of course, they the mom remains in jail on $100,000 bail. She said she had a prescription for medical marijuana, but it turns out she doesn't. Big surprise.

Those poor girls. Weed is, after all, the gateway drunk. They'll probably be crack addicts by the time they're 14 and 15.